Baby playmats - protection for baby's head and mama's bottom

During the learning to sit, crawl, stand, and walk phases there are lots of falls and banged heads. But we were able to minimize the damage by putting a big blue playmat over the area of our hardwood floor where our son usually plays. We found these play mats at ToysRUs, but we later noticed that Costco carried some similar interlocking flooring meant for garages that was even cheaper. Amazon.com also sells lots of versions of these playmats, many in prettier colors or designs.

ToyRUs play mat

As a bonus my husband and I both think that these floor pads are super comfortable for parents who spend a lot of time sitting on the floor with infants. They also work really well as exercise mats as they are more cushiony than most yoga mats. As you can see our baby likes practicing his yoga on these mats too!

Yoga baby practicing downward dog pose on his play mat

Babywearing - a lifesaver for parents with newborns

If I had to pick a single thing that made my life easier during my son's newborn phase it would be owning a good baby carrier and using it all the time: babywearing

If you have ever tried to do basic things (i.e. talk on the phone) while holding a newborn then you understand how babies can turn even the most simple tasks into juggling acts. While babywearing even relatively advanced tasks such as eating a meal, typing emails, and going to the bathroom can be performed with ease. Babywearing is often the fastest way to get newborns to fall asleep; they love being held tight against you and walked around. Once asleep you can either keep them in the carrier or very carefully take them out and lie them down somewhere else.

If you are going shopping and have a baby who hates being in the carseat or stroller then toss that baby into a carrier and shop while he peacefully sleeps. I can not tell you how many times I have been out on errands and women (generally older women) would come up to me and tell me how wonderful it was that I was wearing my baby and how they wish that they had carriers like that when they had their children.

Seven months old and still loving the ring sling

Here is a list of the baby carriers I have used:

• Moby wrap - great for newborns although it takes a day or two or practicing to figure out how to use it. One of my best friends and mommy mentors recommended this and it was a life saver!
• Sweet Pea Ring Sling - unfortunately I did not buy this until my son was around 3 months old but I think it would have been excellent for him as a newborn. However, it was not a favorite with my husband - too girlie for him to wear.
• Balboa - Dr Sears Sling - this was probably my least favorite of our carriers, but we used it a lot because we bought it before we discovered the ring sling or the Ergo. It was good for getting our baby to sleep for naps/night time.
• Ergo baby carrier - after our son was about 4 months old this became the primary carrier we used, it is very very comfortable when carrying older/heavier babies and my husband likes wearing it! In fact we have one photo of him wearing it that I think the Ergo people should include in their catalog. 

Ergo action shot, hood over sleeping baby's head.

If you have a baby that is "colicky" or "high needs" (more on this topic later) then I would make the argument that a good baby carrier is worth its weight in gold. For a long time the only way my son would nap for more than twenty minutes at a time was if he was in a baby carrier and attached to one of his parents. Even if you have your run of the mill non-colicky baby I think most babies are happier being carried especially as newborns so a baby carrier can make for a happier baby which makes for a happier mom and a happier family.

Here is the formula: happy baby = happy mom = happy family!


Websites with great information on babywearing options:

• TheBabyWearer.com
• AskDrSears.com - babywearing
• Better Babywearing blog
• BabyCenter - Babywearing group

Co-sleeping: the fears and the reality

It was apparent from our very first night in the hospital with my son that he was only really comfortable sleeping in bed with mama. For the first four months of his life we went through a whole slew of approaches to sleep (more on this in a later post), but the only way I could guarantee he would fall asleep (and stay asleep) was if he was lying in bed next to me and breastfeeding until he fell asleep.

I resisted co-sleeping for a couple weeks after he was born. The reasons why I was reluctant are mostly what I consider the common fears new mamas have about co-sleeping:

Fears

1. fear of rolling over onto baby
2. fear of baby falling off bed
3. fear of smothering baby with blankets
4. fear of SIDS

All I can say in hindsight is that these fears were basically a result of my inexperience with newborns. Here is my response to these fears after co-sleeping with my newborn for a few months:

Reality

1. As a new mother you have a heightened awareness of what your baby is doing, even when both of you are asleep. This phenomenon is hard to understand until it happens to you. There was no chance I was going to roll over onto the baby (although dads don't always have the same sense of where the baby is in bed, so sometimes this can pose a problem). If anything it was sometimes harder for me to sleep because of new mother anxiety and because every little sound or move my son made would wake me up at first.
2. Newborns do not roll. They can wriggle a little bit (what my husband and I called the B.P.S. "baby propulsion system") but this does not get them very far. Most newborns sleep swaddled and most mamas wake up as soon as baby starts making sounds or moving so there is very little chance they could launch themselves off a bed (of course with older babies this changes). Of course the obvious preventative measure is just to put baby in the middle of the bed.
3. I used to worry my baby would not be able to breathe if the blankets got pushed up against his face, this never happened. By far the bigger problem is that if the blankets get over the baby the baby might get overheated and then wake up and wake you up. Some people go so far as to remove all blankets and pillows from the bed, I took a halfway approach and just pushed the blankets down to my waist.
   
4. the fear of SIDS is harder to explain away since people really do not know what causes SIDS. All I can say is that I felt much better with my son right next to me where I knew I would wake up immediately if he was in distress than I would have felt if he were in another room. Proponents of co-sleeping like Dr. Sears suggest that the risk of SIDS actually goes down with co-sleeping, see this explanation. Check out the AskDrSears.com website for some great advice on co-sleeping and how to do it safely.

A lesson that I learned quickly: newborn babies are well equipped with alarm systems, if they are uncomfortable or in distress they let you know loudly. When I talked to nurses and my pediatrician about co-sleeping they all said that as long as I took basic safety precautions (don't put baby near edge of bed, etc.) it was fine to co-sleep and that in their experience most mothers (especially those who were breastfeeding) did co-sleep at some point.

There is so much more to say about co-sleeping, for example how it really improved both baby and mama's sleep, and when and why we decided to stop co-sleeping - the topic of future blog posts.


So that is my two cents. Any other mamas want to chime in with their perspective on co-sleeping? Please leave a comment.

Baby Apps: Baby ESP (Eat, Sleep, Poop)

So if you are going to spend $ on an app for your mobile phone to track what your baby is doing Baby ESP gives you a lot of bang for your buck at $3.99. And if you are frugal or tentative then try the trial version for free. I used it on my Android phone for about three months and if you are either generally obsessive about your baby, very forgetful, or trying to track your routine then this is the app for you.


What Baby ESP looks like on your phone.


It is easy to use and although I was really only using it to track my son's sleep and nap schedule it has a lot more features. For the truly detail oriented parent you can track nursing times (how long on each side), bottles (how many ounces, how long baby took to drink), diapers (wet and poopy), sleep (naps, night time sleep), medicine your baby is taking, etc. You can also add custom reminders or custom events. For a while I was tracking how long my baby was crying before he fell asleep and seeing the number of minutes crying go down every day was very comforting.


All of your information can be exported to spreadsheets and email and you can see weekly or monthly averages amongst other features. I am sure there are even more functions, but these are just the few that I discovered.


So if like me you were/are actually writing things down the old-fashioned way with a paper and pencil and would like to ditch that early 20th century technology, Baby ESP is for you.


As a bonus using this app consistently was one way that I was able to track just how miserable my son's sleep schedule was until he was four months old and how much his sleep improved (increase in length of time asleep and decrease in length of time before falling asleep) after we did some sleep training when he was four months old - the topic for a future post on sleep training Ferber style.


Anyone else know of other good baby apps or have some feedback on Baby ESP? If so please leave comments...

Rings Toys - Sometimes cheaper is better

Okay I admit my frugal inner-self was pleased that my son's favorite toys are the cheapest baby toys that you can buy - those dinky plastic rings. From about 2 months old to 6 months old these were my son's favorite things ever.

However my more superficial self was a little miffed that I spent money on toys that he would not deign to play with at all. Now that he is a bit older he is finally paying attention to the fancier toys, including all sorts of nice toys his grandparents and aunts gave him as gifts, but for any new parent I would suggest getting a couple sets of the rings. You can find them at Target or BabiesRUs and a lot of drug stores have them in the baby section.

You can link them together, hang other toys from them, link them to the stroller for the baby to play with while you are on a walk, or hand them to him when you put him in the car seat so that he has something to play with while you drive. They are basically indestructible, good for teething, and my son always seemed to derive a lot of pleasure from pulling a big chain of rings apart into separate pieces.

Breastfeeding Lying Down - if you are not already doing this stop reading and try it now!

Breastfeeding = Good for newborn babies
Lying down = Good for new moms
Breastfeeding + Lying down = Happy family!

If you are breastfeeding a newborn baby there is only one thing I know for certain about you - you are exhausted. So if you have not already discovered that you can breastfeed lying down stop what you are doing now and go try it. If you are tired of having to find your Boppy pillow or Brest Friend pillow or tired of arranging pillows behind your back and a footstool at your feet before you can be comfortable for the 45 minutes or more that it takes your baby to nurse then breastfeeding lying down is for you.

I figured out the breastfeeding lying down out of desperation when my son was around 2 weeks old. Like most new parents I was terrified that if I lay down and fell asleep I might roll onto my baby or something else unforeseen but catastrophic might happen. Then one night as I was literally fighting to stay awake while sitting up feeding my son it occurred to me that it was far more likely that I would fall asleep while sitting up feeding him and he might topple off my lap.

So I held him in my arms cradle style and let him nurse and slowly lay down on the bed, and lo and behold he kept eating happily while I lay down in pure bliss and soon after we were both peacefully asleep. Here is where I should insert a warning:

Warning: breastfeeding lying down may lead to co-sleeping or at the very least co-napping (see more below).

So here is what you need to do:

1. lie down on your side on your bed and pull down your bra
2. place your baby parallel to you on his side with his mouth level to your nipple and pull him close (sometimes both of your bodies end up in a bit more of a "V" position)

If your baby has figured out how to latch on the rest will be happen. No really it is that simple. Now there are some tips for newborns that might make it even easier for you.

1. I usually ended up with my lower arm perpendicular to my body above my son's head and my upper arm resting on my hips
2. a pillow behind your back makes mama even more comfortable (the body pillow I used during pregnancy worked perfectly here), a rolled receiving blanket behind your newborn's back might help keep him on his side
3. I would feed my son on one side then get up change his diaper, swaddle him, and then lay down on the other side after which we would both fall asleep

It is so easy that I was in a state of mild shock when I went to a breastfeeding support group when my son was about a month old and out of about ten moms I was the only person there who was breastfeeding lying down. Maybe it is because all the other women had those comfy rocker/gliders for breastfeeding, but what could be as comfortable as sleeping while your baby eats?

A note about breastfeeding lying down on a bed and safety. In order to keep my son in the middle of the bed instead of flipping him over me to feed on the other side I would just get up and walk around to the other side of the bed. Alternatively some mamas are able to simply lean over a little more to feed baby from both breasts while laying on the same side. As a first time mom I was always worried about my son somehow falling off the bed, but he did not roll until he was four months old and being swaddled it was pretty hard for him to move anywhere so this was a little paranoid on my part.

My baby is now ten months old and we still both enjoy breastfeeding lying down (sometimes called the "side lying position"). When he wakes up at 4am I go into his room and lie down on the twin size bed we have in there (he lies on the inside against the wall) and I feed him until he is full and sleepy again. It is also how I feed him first thing in the morning, although the rest of the day he is too rambunctious to spend very long nursing.

Advice for insomniacs - co-napping is for you!

If you were an insomniac before your baby was born chances are even the sleep deprivation of new parenthood has not made it better. I think it makes it worse. When my son was tiny every sound he made would wake me up and it would often take me thirty or forty minutes to fall asleep, by which time he was just waking up. I truly resented the people who said casually “just nap when the baby naps” as if I had overlooked this obvious idea.

However, breastfeeding lying down was my saving grace. Supposedly breastfeeding releases hormones that relax both mother and baby and make you sleepy. In my case this seemed to be true. I fell asleep easily if I just timed my naps with the breastfeeding sessions. It was heaven!

As with all blog posts, I would love to hear comments or questions from readers. I firmly believe that every baby is different and what worked for me might not work for others. The one thing my son really took to like a duck to water was breastfeeding so I would like to hear how breastfeeding lying down works for others.

Here are some good websites with resources on breastfeeding positioning and general help:

kellymom.com: latch-on and positioning help

askdrsears.com: see "side-lying" under breast feeding positions

Photos of what breastfeeding lying down looks like at mother-2-mother.com

The Yucky Bib Problem

I have heard of babies who can eat a meal without needing a bib during and a bath afterwards. Like most babies, my son is not one of these mythical creatures. When we are done with a meal the high chair and the kitchen look like the scene of a epic food fight. At his day care one of his “friends” crawls around the base of the high chair when he eats trying to catch all the food he lets fall or throws down.

He started “eating” around 6 months and we tried bib after bib in order to minimize the mess. Early on we realized we needed one with a big pocket to catch all the foppings (food + droppings). However, anything with cloth on it seemed to get grungy and mildew no matter how quickly I washed it. Even bibs that seemed to be rubber or plastic, but had a little cloth around the neckline became foul in no time.

Then we found the answer to our bib prayers at BabiesRUs: something entirely made of rubbery material. It is indestructible and easy to clean. It is a bib made by Tommee Tippee.

Now if I could only find a system for managing the food that our son hurls onto the floor. A dog would be the perfect solution! But we have agreed that 2 large humans, 1 small human, and 1 arrogant cat is quite enough for our modest sized condo. Now if we ever get a house with a yard a visit to the humane society to find a canine friend will be on our to do list.

So at least for now the bib problem is alleviated, or I should say the meal-time bib problem. We have another drool related bib dilemma still unsolved, but that is a topic for another post: the saga of the drooly baby.

Comments are always welcome, if anyone knows of a better bib please tell me about it!